Pic: pseudopixels
As Valentine’s Day approaches, thousands out there are trying to lock down a date for the night. Online dating has its pitfalls, however, not least in portraying yourself to your potential audience.
Researchers, whose work was published in Evidence Based Medicine, wanted to learn what approaches would maximise the chances of an online interaction leading to a face-to-face meeting.
They carried out a search of studies in the fields of psychology, sociology, behavioural, neurocognitive and computer sciences. Out of almost 4,000 studies, 86 met their criteria. From these, they distilled the right way to approach this particular minefield.
Screen names really matter, so avoid anything negative (Little, Bugg) and instead opt for something playful (Fun2bwith). Men’s eyes are caught by names indicating physical attractiveness (Blondie), while women are more likely to be enamoured with “intelligent” names (Cultured). The right starting point matters too, as search engines are more likely to show up results beginning with letters from the first half of the alphabet.
A profile picture can launch a thousand requests – so make sure to get it right. Smile like you mean it, and try to to include friends, as both men and women respond positively to pictures showing your friendliness, importance and status.
When it comes to stating your intentions, don’t be too complex. Keep it simple and direct, as this will make it easier it process, which will in turn help increase likeability. When describing yourself, be genuine. Tall tales might come back to bite, and anyway, it’s more important to be likeable than impressive, especially when academic achievement is concerned.
Men, it seems, are drawn to physical fitness, while women opt for men who seem to take risks, rather than those who are kind or altruistic. A sense of humour is all well and good, but ‘show, don’t tell’ is the best approach.
The researchers give a list of tips, from keeping communication short to being prompt with responses, advising that it’s best not to paint yourself as perfect (it arouses suspicion) or to sell yourself as a rare commodity.
Finally? Don’t leave it too long before arranging a meeting. So this weekend, you’ve got just the right window.
Evid Based Med doi:10.1136/ebmed-2014-110101
aidan.hanratty@imt.ie
